Wednesday, January 26, 2011

slowly dyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyying......my blog that is.

Digital Overload

I can't keep up.  I can't.  I've said it.  I like blogging.  I LOVE reading other people's blogs.  It's one of those after dinner/before school work/before putting my son to bed, type of wind down from the day activities.  I connect (by myself) with others in the triathlon world -- albeit remotely and from a distance -- but, it reaffirms that I am not alone in trying to slog through workouts....and life.

I don't really slog through life.  Life is terrific.  But sometimes, well, more than sometimes -- it's just too damn busy.  I am a full-time English teacher, own a photography business, a triathlete, a wife and a mom.  And to add to all that -- I chair an eleven member English dept., and advise both the yearbook and newspaper.

I think it's time to give myself permission to let go of the blog occasionally and not feel guilty.  I have this wonderful friend.  She is also an English teacher.  But she also is the most terrific homemaker, making amazing dinners and baking for her family, redecorating her house, starring in local theater productions, etc..  She is simply amazing.  And then she started her blog -- which I LOVE.  But she started 28 days ago and she has posted a blog entry 28 times!!!!!!

I can't compete with that.  And why the hell am I trying to compete at all?  Well, if you know me -- that really isn't a difficult question to answer.  The point is -- I shouldn't be.  Who the hell cares if I post every few weeks?

Part of the problem is that I think I have to have some profound idea or craft some clever writing in order  to be "blog worthy."  Again -- who the hell cares?

I can't keep up my digital life....and it's slowly dying.  Facebook, Daily Mile, Twitter, Google sites, SKYPE, my website, email (4 different accounts for all different reasons), three listserves, texting, apps......... I think I could go on, on, on, on, on, on, on, on........

I LOVE information. I spend my day sharing information, showing how to access information, analyzing information, synthesizing information, creating information, removing information, appreciating information.......and when I get home -- I think that I can't process any more information.

Yes, reading blogs is taking in more information -- but it's temporary.  I connect with someone's experience, relate it to my own and let it go.  Maybe that's why I LOVE those horrible "Real Housewives of Wherever" programs -- they have absolutely NOTHING to do with my life and when the program is over -- I can let it go.

Hats off to all of you who can keep up.  I can't.  I hate being that kid that can't keep up with the bigger kids.  And in most cases -- that would motivate me to work harder.  I don't want to be left out.

But it's self preservation at this point.  I will make appearances when I can.  When I can't -- I have to let it go.  I have to let myself "dump" my digital life.

But today -- we're "back together."  I'm worse than a teenager.

5 comments:

  1. Aww Dawn, I loved reading this. I completely understand and agree with you for much of what you've said here. And I'll be a teenager and throw out a big "I LOVE YOU" to you too!! :) (Doesn't it crack you up how freely teens say those three words to one another these days?!)

    I cannot believe the way life throws "just the right thing" at us. Coming across your blog a few months back inspired me to take one more "baby step" with my writing and I am so grateful to you for that little push you gave me because my own blog has been so incredibly therapeutic at a time when I really needed this kind of outlet. I think it's more about what we "need" to do for ourselves. Maybe I just need to blog right now for my health, and you don't need to blog right now for your own.

    But also know that I envy your photography business and the fact that you are a fitness powerhouse! And for you to be so successful at the numerous things you do just proves how much you ROCK! Remember how we met one another and we both immediately thought, "Wow. She reminds me of someone?!?!? ME! ha ha! Remember though, my youngest is 11 years old now. :)

    P.S. At the bookstore today I bought "Hamlet's BlackBerry" by William Powers. I am very interested to read it! Check it out. I know you'll want to read it too ! Grab a diet coke and enjoy!

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  2. There are no deadlines looming.
    There are no assignments here.

    This is YOURS to do with as you wish~
    and electronic account of your journey thru life as a woman who wears many hats each day :) It's ok...

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  3. Hi! I found you on Mary's blog. I liked what you said about "holding back " on a blog post. I hold back all the time. I WISH I could be more free with my posts but just can't. I can also relate to "not keeping up". I have struggled with that often. I now find I blog when I can and don't feel guilty about it and don't dwell on the fact that I haven't blogged in a while.

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  4. Don't fret! Many of the bloggers I 'follow' find themselves in this same situation. If your blog is just something else that you HAVE to do, it takes all the fun out of it. Write when you can, and the posts will continue to be wonderfull when you get around to writing them in your spare time. I, personally, went through a creative drought and just had to let my mind focus on other things-- like Real Housewives of Wherever! (New Jersey & New York are my faves, and now Bev. Hills, I can't help myself!)-- until it was time to be back in the blogosphere. Seriously, you do SO much, I was surprised to see that you had time for a blog! You really are wonderwoman. You continue to inspire me past our 4 short years together as teacher and student :-) xoxo

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  5. Anne - I miss Diet Coke!!!! I have cut waayyyyy back because of my training and this damn Paleo way of eating. Too much green stuff and meat -- all natural. I haven't found a caveman with a diet coke yet -- but I'll keep looking. I'll have to pick up that book this weekend! :)

    Hi Melissa - nice to meet you. I tend to hold back too -- but maybe the more we blog - the more we will let go of those self-conscious hangups. Mary is truly fearless. I gotta learn to let go - in more ways than one. :)

    Miss Sam -- thanks for the pep talk. Love the fact that the roles are reversing here a bit. :) New York for sure -- BevHIlls -- OMG -- love it!!! Jersey is just a bit too Jersey for me if you know what i mean. :0

    And Jen -- you are my grounding force. No matter where my head goes -- you bring it back to where it should be. You always help me to BELIEVE. Love ya!

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